Iron Dad: Strength through Cancer, Triathlons, & Fatherhood

My life always felt hard. I had an isolated childhood, with distant and detached parents and lost my college sweetheart in a horrible tragedy. It really felt like I spent my life in despair. It all just hurt. But that changed the day my daughter, Natalie was born. From day one, she and I have shared an incredible bond. She’s been a constant source of peace and inspiration to me, and I’ve been determined to give her the love and security I never had.

I had become a real athlete in my 30s and found that exercise and pushing myself to the limit was part of my identity. Over time that evolved from 5Ks to marathons, and eventually to triathlons. My life and the family I dreamed about seemed to be finally getting on track, until I was diagnosed with stage III colorectal cancer when I was 43.

I found myself injured from racing and on the operating table as a result. That’s partly how we found out that I had cancer before it was too late. I had some post-surgery complications which eventually led to me learning I had cancer. So really, being an athlete, let alone a triathlete, saved my life.

I believed in hope, and believed in the impossible knowing the incredible could come true. Using this mantra, I pushed forward, determined to show my daughter strength and determination. Facing the ups and downs of my illness and treatment, I trained for and completed an Ironman triathlon six months after chemotherapy, all while continuing to be a dedicated dad. I couldn’t imagine having my life cut short, not seeing her future — her first boyfriend, prom, jobs, getting married and having children. That just wasn’t an option.

I put on my Livestrong wristband 20 years ago when a family member thought he might have cancer and have refused to take it off unless medically necessary. Livestrong has meant just that — believing the impossible — doing everything you can to live your best life EVERY SINGLE DAY.

When I was diagnosed, I contacted Livestrong looking for advocacy and support, and was introduced to cancer mentor, Fran Curry. He answered my questions and helped me through my cancer treatment journey. I’m forever grateful to him and to Livestrong.

There are so many things I want to share with others. First and foremost, if you’re 45 or older, get screened for colorectal cancer. Over the last few years, the disease has become one of the leading cancer causes of death for both men and women.

Second, if you’re a patient, or have symptoms, don’t be afraid to have rough conversations with your doctor. YOU know your body and when things aren’t right. Finally, FIGHT. FIGHT until you can’t fight any longer. Don’t let a devastating diagnosis take away your future, your hopes, or your dreams. And if you’re too tired to fight, have others, like those at Livestrong, fight for you.

Paul’s book, Iron Dad: A Cancer Survivor’s Story of Discovering Strength, Life, and Love Through Fatherhood, is out now.